I'm sorry (again) for the long time since last update!
I have been busy, but surely not as much as Aby...Exams and that stuff, and I HAD wrote an update...until the internet ate it! AGAIN!
Screw my internet...
And please don't ask me what i have been doing the last few days...cause I don't rememeber it clearly. I don't rememeber ANYTHING clearly anymore...
But I do remember that I have forgot homework for almost 3 weeks, I do remember that there's still blood running out of my back, I do remember that mom and me is arguing so much that the roof is close to fly and I do aslo remember that feeling of guilt over lying to cover over the truth. So say straight, I lie to cover over EVERYTHING!
But the good is, whe I'm depressed, it's there I make my most beautifull work. And so have I done...
My first FanArt of Anzu Mazaki and Seto Kaiba!
And I have just begun on a NEW FANFICTION! (22 pages so far!)
*Daaaaamn proud*
(Anzu and Seto is one of my favorit cuples...Yeah, I know it's a strange one, but I think there's many things they have similair!)
And what's more? Well...
I'll update when I found out!
Hi hi here I am!
And I'm STILL alive! The surgery went fine! So let's start with telling about it!
I came to the Hospital, that place for the children is called D2, 8.30 as planned. But there was some kids before me. So...I'll have to wait.
I got in the hospital clothing, a button up short dress, and up in one of the beds. That part was scary. I really felt like it was seriouse when I HAD to get into that bed!
First at 9.50 a man came to bring me to the surgery room. Beleive me...I didn't feel good!
The last thing I remember from the room is that I was interduced to the doctors and that they put some diffrent instruments on me. One to check bloodpresure, one to heart-rythm and then...that thing I REFUSED to looke at...a needel in my left had to get the sleeping drug in...
Mom was with me...that does I rememeber...and that I felt tears down my cheeks....not that I was THAT scared...then the drug was giving...and everything went black...
Then, the first thing I remember after, was a smiling face. One of the female doctors. She said "Good Morning, it's over now!" I think I wispered a little "Thank you" and then I fell into sleep again.
Second time I woke up, I remember I was laying down on the bed I was transproted in and that some of the instruments still where cobled to me. Mom wasn't there. Not yet.
Then another female doctor saw me awake and gave me something to drink. I couldn't swallow it, so most of it went back again. Ops...
After around 10-15 minuttes, I heard mom comming. I couldn't see her because of the white cotton sheet there was the "walls" between each patient.
Then she ripped it away and was by my side with hyper-speed.
She had cried. I could see it on her.
When we got back at D2 I got something to eat. I couldn't eat much, despite I was hungry like hell. Why? Well...I got "air in my stomach" and I HURTED!
So I farted xDDDDD
Around 2.10pm we could go home.
And what about the last few days?
Well...I haven't got the lab results, but I'm feeling better! But then...more problems...
I have got my fucked up depresion back. Yesterday at the guitar lesson, I wnet TOTALY down! Not a good way to start! I went I total panic and couldn't find the right strings and the sound was just WRONG!
And that smell of metal the strings on a guitar, the same as coins also have, went straigt into my brain and made me panic.
Well...Let me tell. I have this, silly, habit...or how to call it, that I HATE the smell of METAL! It is reminding me of blood and that make me panic. Of same reson, I really tried to avoid toutching coins, door knobs and that kind of stuff that have that smell.
Because of the, and something other, i have told Berit to quit me freom the team. Helene don't know yet, but I'll tell her tomorrow. About Helene...I also had "Computer and Video" lessons with her. Also THEM have I decided to quit. The reason is my tiredness and my missing/forgot homework.
There is more little incidents there have made me became sad...I really don't want to tell about it!
To make me laugh again, I have been on grineflip.dk! It means something like "Laughing-fit" and there was a picture of two cats and someone laughing! I WAS SO FUN!
When ototo saw it, he was also roling on the floor! I can't waite to show mom!
SHE IS GOING TO LAUGH HER ASS OFF FOR SERIOUSE!
*Watching time go pass...*
tic tac tic tac tic tac tic tac tic tac...
Okay...
This is how the day had been spending...
Woke up at 8 and watched TV with niisan...I got on the computer around 12 o'clock and have been there, mostly, since.
Also at 12, I got the first 2 pills. Again at 3.30 I got the next 3 pills and the first of that (FUCKING) 1½ litre of SALTWATER I have to swallow! (I vomited some of it up again! Beleive me! It taste like shit! Even with fruite-juice in!)
The time is now 5pm or so and the effect of the water is starting to kick in...STOMACH PAINS!
The next houres will go with sitting on the toilet and shit my stomach out!
Okay...there's bad and there's good news today!
I'll start with the good ones!
September the 14th was just as funny as seeing my brothers world-wide famous Bionicle building!
Hahaha! xD
...
Bad example!
My pointe! IT WAS SO FUNNY WITH HELENE AND MAIKEN IN SLAGELSE!
At 1.15pm, me and Helene was standing on the bus station. We took Bus 31 to Slagelse, but had a stop in Helenes town (I can't tell where it is!) We buy some Mine Meals and ate them, while waiting for the bus where Maiken was.
The bus came, we stepped in and off we go!
By the way...I dunnoe what that twit of a bus-driver was on, but HE DROVE LIKE HELL!
And Helene just says..."That's very normal!"
WHAT?! Oh my godness! O.O;;;
When we reatched Slagelse, we started to go over to Panorama. And guess? THEY WHERE CLOSED!
So we decided to go to a candy store, Helene knew! And HELL...there where candy and sweets in there!! Over 400 diffrent kinds of winegum, chockolate, chewinggum and I could go on!
We got some bags filled and walked to "Tiger!" It's a shop where everything just cost 10 or 20 danish kroner (Kr.) Oh so many funny thing you can get in there! I got a mirrow+hairbrush and some drawing pencils!
We then went to the local mall. And it's a HUGE mall! We walked into the beauty-store, the book shop, the jewel-store (OH SO EXPENSIVE THEY WHERE!!!) and a little resturant where Maiken and I got hotdogs! Helene took some salad! EW!
We where in Slagelse for almost 3½ houres (I was home at 5.30pm), but 6 houres wouldn't have annoyed me! ^_^
(And some more money!!)
Mwawahahah!
And The Bad News!
That's for today...I went to hospital!
HEY! TAKE IT SLOW! I'm Allright!
I got a mail yesterday from Holbaek hospital...they want tó find out where all the blood from my poo came from.
Ya see...for long time, when I where on toilet...and make...poo...it start bleeding very much! I got the blood test to chek that the poo wasn't in my blood. But the doctors want to be sure that I didn't have any organs in my body, who maybe can have been injured, and cause the bleedings!
Mom and me waited for 4 houres before the doctor could speak with us. She told me, that the had to do a telescopic examination of my...well...of my ass!!
And to do that, they have to put me in total anaesthesia!
Mom paled when she heard that...
But she coldly said that if that's what needed, then we have to do it...
The reson why mom don't like it, is that some pepole never wakes again. If they get an overdosis, they'll die of it...
The examination is on Monday!
But...many things have to be done before...! I had another bloodtest taken and a urin test (pee in a cup and examin it! DISGUSTING!!)
And better...I'M GOING TO HAVE A STOMACH DRAIN!
That means...drink 1½ litter of SALTWATER and shit it all out!!!!!
Beleive me...this few days is gonna be hard!
Of same reson, mom and I have decided that we're not calling Dad or any other. The bad of this, is that I'm going to miss school...oh, whatever!!!
Oh my...
Now I'm sure...too little sleep is beginning to affect me! Both emotinal and in school!
Today just ended up in chaos...
Tiredness and 7 lessons DON'T mix good! It started good, but went bad at the 4th lesson. My stomach was starting to do crap and I was suddenly aware of just how much noice and movement a class of 20 kids do!
And better! I GOT DETENTION! I had forgot some homework in Dansih and...I got my firste detention EVER!
Oh my once again...
At sience, I couldn't take more. Torben (the teatcher) didn't notice, but some of my class mates did.
"Natasha! You look like a strangled cat!"
Lone (our head-teatcher) came in and saw me. I got premession to one lesson before time. Many of my class mates tried to stop and speak to me, but when Natasha Jung is in a bad mood...then it's better just to leave me by myself!
I didn't feel better on the way home. The thought of housework made my mood, if it's possible, WORSE!
I called mom, who once again had forgot to turn on her phone, and cried my eyes out!
You really feels at lot better after crying!
But thanks to ototo, who came home one houre later, he took care of Milles "toilet" and Tyson!
Now, the dishes and my homework is the only left...
Bad day:
In case of bad day, Please turn on some good music!
So I did and I feel a lot better! (Please don't get worried Aby! I'M OKAY!)
Tomorrow I meeting later in school. I shall have visit of Iben! She is the social helper of my district! She is so kind and good to talk too! *smiles*
AND! If my memory isn't totaly wrong, then is Maiken, Helene and I going to Panorama in Slagelse to watch a movie together! MY FIRST CINEMA-WATCH WITH MY NEW FREINDS!
I'M SOOOOO SORRY FOR THE LONG TIME SINCE LAST UPDATE! *anime cries...*
To say straigt...world's been absoloutly horrible against me!
The last few days, I have that feeling of every singel drop of energy, slowly slipping out of my body! And I think I know why...
I'm not getting the right food and I get too little sleep!
If anyone shouldn't have seen it, some of the only food I get, is what the serve on McDonalds and in the local Junk Food resturant! And I was the one there want to look sexy-slim when I go to boarding school next year! And to not speak about ototo! But I'm not the one to decide that! IT'S MOM! And it's also mom's fault of MY MISSING SLEEP!
She is fucking sitting on the damn computer on her fucked up love sites! And guess what?!
SHE IS NOT EVEN LOOKING FOR A BOYFREIND!
SHE IS JUST SITTING THERE AND GETS COMPLIMENTS FROM MALES!
Not that I even WANT a man in here, it's the last thing I EVER needs by now! She is more ego than me!
But thats's not my pointe!
MY POINTS IS...that when she sits on the computer IN MY ROOM, AND SMOKES, I HAVE TO WAIT TO GO TO SLEEP!
AND SHE CAN SIT THERE UNTIL FUCKING 11.30 PM!
AND IN THE WEEKENDS, IT'S A NIGHTMARE!
And..HELLO! I also wants to go online and speak with my buddys! And then she just says that I can wait to the week starts again when she is on work!
HELLO LADY!!! WAKE UP TO REALLITY!!!
I GOT MORE HOME WORK THAN EVER, I GOT FUCKED UP HOUSEWORK TO DO AND A PRIVATE-LIFE WITH MY FREINDS IN SCHOOL!
And there's not too long time before I also starts on Guitar playing and other things after school time...
How did she just think I'll manage to do all in time?
Oh and by the way...I'm bleeding more than ever and I look like the Death herself, in own ugly person...
*sobs...*
I'm depressed...I can't draw at the moment...Mom's seriously sick in her head...Daniel is driving me mad...The computer starts to freak out again...
*teardrops...*
I really can't wait to get out of this hell hole!
I dunnoe if I have told it before, but next year I'm going on a boarding school. The social pepole I have been in touch with, says that I really will feel good if all the responsibility is lifted away from me...
In that time, I really didn't beleive them...but now...it suddenly appears that they where more than right about me! I thought I never will be argueing with mom and always obey to her...
But I doesn't...
I'm sticking together with Daniel always! From 2pm to 7.30 am the next day and so on! And when mom comes home, ragnarok is out!
Mom is too safe by me...she KNOWS I don't have any other places to go.
I can't go to dad...I know I'll regret it sooner or later! But just to make mom pissed off...I'M SO close just to do it...
And now...Mom and I have argued again...she is still pissed off and have went to sleep...
And great! Tomorrow...2 freaking lessons with Torben again! I really hopes I'm in a FAR better mood!
I'll go to sleep now...if I can! I have got paranoia! I see spinders everywhere!!!!!
*Yaaaaaaawn...*
Oi...What's up?
Sorry for not having updated for a while, and I can only exuse that with, that I have been to tired and sleepy for the past while.
Last monday, I got the results from the blood test. It says that I was fine and no blood illness.
I'm nearly disarpointed. If it WAS a blood illness, I could get some answers why my stomach hurts. But now, mom is going crazy to find out what's wrong...She even have called a hospital!
*"Mooooom! Take is eaasy!"*
And about the tiredness. I have been so tired that I was close to lay down and sleep class! $hIt!
ARG! I hate it! And now...NEXT TOPIC!
I'm still crazy with reading everything Seto-involved and lisent to music. Thanks to LimeWire, I can take more and better music down in the computer! (I have even being to lisent to German music! LONG LIVE ICH+ICH!)
I love my music, I love my music, I love my music SO MUCH!
Isn't it strange? Just one year ago, I will have banded whatever love-involved, and now, I'm crying my eyes out over a SetoXAnzu or SetoXShizuka Fic! Also kissing...eew...I really hated it! But now...*giggle*...I almost hope they did it more offen! *Bright Blush*
Today, I'll have a new lesson in school. "Movie and Computer!" It's gonna be good!
*Reels to the computer...*
Oh my...*falls down on the chair...*...*sighs...*
Okay...let's start from the beginning...what did happen on Friday?
I was damn close to be late, again, because I was reading FanFic's (I'm totaly addicted to everything with Seto Kaiba involved) from around 5 am. I forgot time and managed only in last second to reatch class in time. In class, the other teams start to tell. The topics was:
Football
Food
Wisky and Beer
Loch Ness
Clans/Bagpipe & Scotland
As you see, I where the last one to tell. And when it finally came to our groupe, I went down. I suddenly couldn't see what their stood on the fucking paper!!!!!!!
ARG! EMERGENCY!
I had to, in the best way I could, tell what I knew about the Clan MacDonald and the Clan Wallace.
To my huge surprise, it went good!
Helene took the Scotland telling and Johnny didn't tell what he should about bagpipes, so I had to tell thoes few things I knew.
I promise, someday, that shit to Johnny gotta pay back for this!!
When we all had got the points from our groupe work from Lone, Anne Grete suddenly spoke the she had made a point scale on our pressentations.
Guess what?
Johnny got a 5
Hele got a 8
and I got a 10!
//Fact: In Danish schools, the point scale is bulid like this:
0.0 (Zero point zero the the worst to get)
0.3
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
13 (thirteen is the best you can get)//
After the points, we saw the last of "Braveheart". (YEEEEES!)
But but but...
We didn't see IT ALL. The last five minuts where skipped, afterwards class where over!
SHIT! I gonna write a letter to the headmaster and complain about the stupid thing! ò.ó
Around 2 pm that day, Ototo was comming home, by train, and mom and me was waiting for him at the station. He looked happy to see us and mad at everyone else.
My "bright sunshine" of a brother is home...Oh heavens...T^T
Oh well...with Daniel home, we got to the mall and I got the new mangas! *cries in happiness*
The Yu-Gi-Oh! was just too great! Yugi beat Pegasus!
The Tokyo Mew Mew was sweet as always! Ther is comming to more book better knowen as, Tokyo Mew Mew á la mode!
Love Hina was surprising and Dragonball was borring...but Ototo likes it a lot!
But something happned...I found a new Manga! And that's not all...I THINK IT'S A YAOI!
Omg omg omg!!!
It looked so innocent and suddenly the where kissing! O.O The manga is named "Demon Diary"
Yaoi in DK...that's more than unbelivable!
And today...I where sleeping to 2pm...WHAT GOT INTO ME?
I have been tired all day...and I slept the damn day away!
Oh welll not the WHOLE day! At 5.15 pm I was in the Panorama cinema in Slagelse to watch "Madagascar!" It's the new animated film, created by the same people who made "Shrek"!
To me, I don't think "Madagascar" is better than "Shrek" but it's still a great movie.
Today it's 1st of September!
That means a new month!
And a new month means new manga on the street on Friday!!!
Yes yes yes yes yes yes yeeeeeeeees!
This time, I gotta buy:
The 7th and last book of Tokyo Mew Mew ...
The 9th book of Love Hina ...
The 15th book of Yu-Gi-Oh! ...
The 13th book of Dragonball Anime Comic ...
Oh my, oh my, oh my holy God! xD
And it's also tomorrow Ototo comes home from camp. I have really enjoyed to stay alone with mom (DAMN we have eaten a lot of junk Food the last 5 days!!), but everything just seems so wierd without him!
But what about today?
In school, Helene, me and (Surprising) Johnny, got nearly everything done to tomorrow. There, we all is gonna tell about our projects. While the othe rin my groupe is gonna tell about Bagpipe and kilt/tartan, I gonna tell about the Clans...and...I gotta translate it all from a document of english. I'm very close to be sure, that I'll screw totaly and say somthing stupid! T^T
Shit shit shit and more shit!
Hey...there is running some rumors that Helenes cousin, he is gay by the way, is gonna show up and tell about Sean Connery! YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE FACE OF HELENE WHEN SHE HEARD THAT! xDD
Revenge sweetheart...revenge! *devil smirk* (if she faints, I have promised to grap her!)
Mwaahahahahaaa! xD
To say everything straigt: Tomorrow's gonna be great!!!
Oh! And before I forget it!
Like the new Layout? I really does! I have never played Final Fantasy before, but the picture and the way the skin is build up...it's just what I have been looking after!
So I decided to chose this!
My Hates
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